November 7, 2002

Descent of Dana

I would like to extend a mighty shout out to my sister, who got a 780 on the GMAT. That's out of 800. She's a genius and I am very proud.

Today is Colposcopy Day! Please direct some happy thoughts my way at 2:00 p.m. Central/Mountain. It's going to cost about $1,000,000 even with insurance. Whee! They'll look at my cervix with the colposcope, and if anything looks freaky, they'll snip out cell samples and send them off to be biopsied, and I still won't know for weeks on end what, if anything, is wrong with me. My very favorite colposcopy website has some lovely pictures of the instruments used. I particularly adore the caption: The small sharp teeth allow for precision. Woo! Hoo! I'm especially excited about the coffee grounds-like discharge I've been told to expect.

In household news, Daisy has discovered a way to jump into the neighbors' very insecurely fenced backyard, giving me fits of anxiety. They dogs are now indoors unless I'm home and closely watching them cavort in the backyard with their devious plots to escape the loving home and Scooby Snacks I tirelessly provide for them. DPW is finally at the house to fix the giant sinkhole in the yard that happened after they fixed the giant sinkhole in the street in front of the yard. Aw, DPW. You've got to love them. We're getting the carpets steam cleaned on Saturday, and scarcely can I recall when I've been so excited about something. Does this mean I am old and decrepit? I guess so. I'm moving everything out of the way except for the really heavy, cumbersome shit like couches and beds and pianos. Whatever possessed me to buy a home with white berber carpet I will never, ever understand. I am scared that all of the dog and cat hair sucked up will break the machines and I will get in trouble with the carpet cleaning people, but that's just a chance I'm going to have to take.

Did I mention that my sister is a freaking genius? Well, she is. Like, the average GMAT score of students entering Harvard in the fall of 2002 was a 705. 705! She's got that number beat by 75 points! Truly, I am amazed.

My little brother is up and flying to San Francisco on his birthday to see the Counting Crows at the Fillmore with his ex-girlfriend. He convinced my parents to pay for his airfare and concert ticket. I am glad to see that the tradition of convincing the parents to let the kids do practically anything is proudly being upheld. That is the secret, people. If you are very, very careful not to get caught doing anything bad (like, for example, convincing the cop to send your ticket for Minor in Possession to your sister's house instead of your parents' house -- not that any sibling of mine has ever done that, oh, no indeed), then your parents will trust you to do things like gallivant off thousands of miles away for a concert on the night of your sister's engagement party. I think their letting him go is also closely related to the fact that they just got back from Italy and are still floating around on their own wanderlust and want to douse anyone they can. It's kind of a beautiful thing, really.

The Sports Night DVD box set arrived today, and I am overjoyed.


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