 On My Mind Today |
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My skin is clearer than it has been since my prepubescent days. I am 100% blemish-free, and I love it. Thank you, Benzaclin! My mom called me yesterday to tell me that I give her great joy and that she smiles every time she thinks of me. Maryelizabeth will be here in two weeks. Home Depot is offering a twelve month no interest plan for window treatments right now, so my faux wood blinds might go from dream to reality. After five long years, I only have two more payments to make on my car. I only have four more payments to make on my flooring. Sink me, my very favorite version of The Scarlet Pimpernel is now available on DVD. I'm going out for yummy food and drinks tonight. I'm going to one of my favorite local fairs soon, and I plan to buy homemade earrings, eat homemade food, and walk in the sunshine with my friend's baby. I have a new friend whose mother used to sell blinds, so she is going to be my blinds yoda. We're going to check them out on Sunday. I do not know why I am so excited about this. I've hated my curtains since they day I moved in ... they are way too long for the windows and they get SO furry and gross and I hate opening them because I feel so exposed to the world, so it's always so dark and gloomy. I can't wait to get rid of the curtains of doom and let the light shine in. I need to develop a little more pride in my house. More and more of my friends are getting homes that are like showcases. I worry that my house is the dumpiest and dirtiest of them all, but then I remind myself that even though their houses are really fancy, fancy is not really my style. I like my framed Broadway showcards and my Charlie Chaplin poster that I found in the trash at Disney World and my fridge covered with photos of family and friends and these magnets. As jealous and inferior as I somehow feel in terms of my friends' homes, their homes are just not me. Their furniture and decor are lovely, but it's kind of like walking into a furniture store or the pages of a women's magazine instead of into an expression of someone's personality and wishes and dreams. I mean, maybe that stuff represents their wishes and dreams because they wish to be elegant if expressionless automatons, but I like my homemade John Black "Have a Sexy Christmas" ornament that hangs from a turquoise glass bottle on my kitchen windowsill and my cases full of children's books and my 8x10 glossies of movie couples and my weird religious art that belonged to my grandmother and the Our Lady of Guadalupe candle in my bathroom that has a little tiny stuffed unicorn sitting on it that Melissa gave me to remind me that the happy ending cannot come in the middle of the story. I know they probably don't like that stuff, but I do. And it should not make me feel childish or incompetent if my house is nothing like theirs. And I think at the heart of this is that it's just one more way that I am different from them, and I hate it when some of them try to tell me what they think would look nice in my house, as if I haven't given my house any thought at all and need their interior decorating advice. Well, I don't. So really, just fuck off. GOD. I don't know. I feel that a lot of the filth could be abated in the absence of my four very furry animals, but a little dust and dirt and hair is the price I pay for them, I guess. I love the dogs and cats so much, and I can't imagine life without Marley's spy kitty antics, Khaki's regal know-it-all-ness, Zuko's hysterical mania, or Daisy's sweet craziness, but would I choose again to have four at one time? No, probably not. I know lots of people have lots more, but it's just ... a lot. For me, anyway. Maybe as the dogs get older they will calm down, and maybe now that I have finally decided to kick the cats out of the bedroom at night I will get a decent night's sleep. After last weekend when I ate my weight in cocktail party desserts and Chinese food, I posted neither a loss nor a gain this week. I feel okay about that. It's been four weeks, and I've lost 2.6 pounds. And that's cool. I know that almost all of the time now, I am eating so much more healthily than I was before that it has to be doing long-term good for my body and soul. That said, I am eating a rum cake muffin right now. Happy Friday. Thank you, Gael, for telling me about AccuBroadway. Julie Andrews is singing "A Lovely Night" right now, and it is making me really happy. Oh my God, now "Blow High, Blow Low" is being sung by John Raitt! This is awesome. Chez Miscarriage is a really, really good blog. See?
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