 Less of a Zombie |
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I enjoyed the Core plan last week. I had more energy than I did before, and that was my main goal, so I deem it a success so far. I didn't lose any weight, but I'm not really losing sleep over that right now. I started my period the day after my weigh-in, and I know I sport major bloatage at this time, and my clothes feel a little looser and I feel more well-rested and overall just in a better place mentally and physically. So I'm going to stick with it for now, because the whole concept of not measuring or counting is so liberating that I feel much less like a slave to a diet and more like a proactive food eater and preparer. And I've really enjoyed what I've been cooking, and I can't not eat bread because then I can't take my vitamins, because if there is not bread in my stomach immediately before, there will be projectile vomiting. So for lunch I've been eating a Boca burger or a turkey sandwich on a small whole wheat bun (which has zero points, unbelievably) and taking my vitamins with that. And one night last week, I had some whole wheat pasta. And I know that something in my system is relearning sugar because what would have formerly been somewhat of a bland if soothing snack of no-sugar-added-applesauce is now like a refreshing explosion of sweet ecstasy on my tongue. I went back to the gym yesterday for the first time in months, and I stayed on the elliptical for twenty-five minutes before my legs turned to rubber and I broke out in a cold sweat and fled unsteadily to the dressing room where I felt like I was either going to pass out or throw up. I hadn't eaten for about five hours, and it was a breakfast of a homemade raspberry smoothie poured over dry shredded wheat and bran cereal, and I think there just wasn't enough food in my stomach to sustain me through a longer workout. I feel good about going, and hopefully I'll make it back at least a couple of times this week. In a major development, I also bought myself some undereye circle concealer. I don't know what took me so long. I have no idea if anyone else can tell a difference, but I feel like a new person. I feel so much less zombie-like that I expect people to say, "My God, Eliza! Have you been on a cruise?" I got the yellow-based neutralizer shade because Shelley and Oprah's beauty editor told me that was the way to go. I was able to sit in the press area for the game this weekend, and it was gloriously air-conditioned and a lot of fun even though a game where we win by fifty points is automatically kind of a snoozer. I passed up all of the free jambalaya, salad, rolls, hot dogs, chips, and plethora of desserts and nursed my diet coke instead. Media people are crazy. It's cool to see what goes on behind the scenes. Sometimes I would feel mildly cranky at having to stand up for most of the game, but then I would think of my sister who have stood on one leg or on hot coals to be able to be there, and my attitude was appropriately adjusted. My mom reported later that the cute guy who now sits next to us in our regular seats asked where I was and then asked how old I was and was surprised because he thought that I was sixteen! I took that as a profound compliment and proof that perhaps I don't look as old and tired as I think I do. Of course, he might have attributed my undereye circles to the rain-induced mascara raccoon eyes, but still. People are getting in a real flurry around here over Ivan. I went to Walmart at lunch just to make myself feel productive about it and stocked up on dog and cat food and litter. My mom offered to buy tape for my windows. All the D batteries at the store were already gone. The low lying parishes are already doing voluntary evacuation. It's just so hard to tell right now. The worst hurricane of my lifetime was Andrew, but we just lost power for ten days. We lay around the house in our swimsuits. As I've written before, I talked to my summer camp boyfriend on the phone for hours on end while lying on my floor next to the open window sweating and eating poptarts and dry Ramen noodles. The worst damage I knew of was a tree falling on my friend Karla's house, forcing her family to move out for six months. I know it was nothing, nothing, nothing compared to what other communities have been through. I can deal with no power. I think I can even cope with no water. But I do worry about the wind and the trees. I lost the top half of a very tall pine tree during a bad storm in early 2002, and luckily it was so far back in the yard that it stopped just short of hitting the house, but no trees left have such a safe distance. I was worried enough during Hurricane Lili to tape up my windows, and I guess I might do it again. I worry about New Orleans and my Panhandle friends from my days there, but at the same time, I'm so relieved that the same part of Florida will not be hit AGAIN. We're west of the projected path as of right now, but barely, and Lord knows what it will do in the next couple of days. So I watched Jack and Bobby last night. (Spoilers ahead if you haven't watched it yet.) And I have to say that my main impression is that the kid who plays Jack is hot like fire. Looking past that distraction, I don't know. I mean, I was bugged that the mom was what appeared to be a successful college professor, and thirteen years ago she was working two jobs and made no mention of, say, being in school or earning advanced degrees at that time, and not long before that, she was a waitress in Mexico. That must have been one fast-ass education and career progression. So that bugged me, as did the revelation that Jack died and that his high school love interest ended up being married to Bobby. I don't know. I just feel like maybe they gave away too much too soon, and that the guy the mom met ended up to be the jerk she was railing to him against was painfully obvious. It was well done, though, overall, in spite of all that, and I think I'll watch it again. I don't know. I'm still thinking about it. And goddamn. Jack is hot. Speaking of television, I guess one sign that perhaps I don't need to be TiVoing General Hospital every day is that I have had not one but two erotic dreams about Nicholas Cassadine. 
 About this time in ...
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