July 7, 2005


I was worrying today about London, horrifying and terrifying as it is, and then I started worrying about Hurricane Dennis, which may not even be horrifying or terrifying, and selfishly I'm sitting here hoping that it does not keep me from seeing my boyfriend this weekend. So I decided that when worried about things both very serious and only potentially serious, why not imitate Chiara? Thankfully, Annie and Andrew, both in London today, are safe.

Songs I have listened to lately that have me made sing out loud:

"Let the River Run"*

"Brush Up Your Shakespeare"**

"There's No Business Like Show Business"***

(*Best when listened to at 6 in the morning while driving down the interstate.)

(**A surprisingly dirty song Ö I mean, "Kick her right in the coriolanus?" "Let her sample your measure for measure?")

(***Must be sung in Ethel Merman voice.)

Places I've sent money to lately:



Jcrew.com, Nordstrom.com, Target.com***

(*Via Mandy.)

(**If my mother knew this, she would faint.)

(***Sometimes a girl needs a swimsuit that fits and has no idea what size to order.)

Dream jobs (a Chiara category):

Young adult librarian*

Seat filler at the Oscars**

Child pose demonstrator***

(*Not in a school library because thinking about working in a school again makes me sweaty and itchy.)

(**Preferably next to Juliette Binoche.)

(***The only thing I can actually do in yoga class.)

Movies I've seen all or part of lately:


We Donít Live Here Anymore**

Wings of Desire***


(**One of the worst movies I've ever seen, which was surprising, because I like the entire cast.) (Except for Naomi Watts.)

(***When the child was a child, it was the time of these questions. Why am I me, and why not you? Why am I here, and why not there?
When did time begin, and where does space end? Isn't life under the sun just a dream? Isn't what I see, hear, and smell just the mirage of a world before the world? Does evil actually exist, and are there people who are really evil? How can it be that I, who am I, wasn't before I was, and that sometime I, the one I am, no longer will be the one I am?

(Pretty much what keeps me [and probably everyone else in the world] up at night.)

Places I am looking forward to going:

Costa Rica*


The spa***

(*Kind of afraid of giant beetles and dengue fever but mostly just excited to go somewhere so beautiful and hang out with my sister.)

(**Where I will see the Chesapeake Bay for the first time.)

(***With my elemental nature massage gift card.)

Things I've been reading:

The Pat Conroy Recipe Book*

This powerful entry about marriage by my friend Erin**

Andre Dubus***

(*Pat Conroy is best left to occupy my sixteen-year-old consciousness, where I read him again and again and loved him. But I picked this one up off a shelf at work and read the whole thing in a sitting. The recipes made my mouth water, but I liked the little stories best. He is such a cheeseball, but I have such affectionate memories of being so touched by the Wingos and Ben Meecham and Will McLean and his stories of being a teacher that I can't dislike him.)

(**Erin says hard things frankly and straightforwardly and bravely. She always has, and I am glad she still does.)

(***I remembered that I had a book of essays by him that belonged to my grandmother. I took it down after watching We Don't Live Here Anymore [again: not recommended!] because it's based on a couple of his short stories. My grandmother clipped articles on Dubus and his obituary, all now yellowed with age like newspaper becomes, and folded and stuck them within the pages, where they lay neatly flattened. She wrote her full name with a flourish in the inside cover and also wrote the following:

One cannot forget Andre as a writer or friend or Catholic.

Obviously, she was a fan. I asked my mom about it, and she said, "Oh yeah, she knew him." But she couldn't remember how. She thinks they took a class together. I'm going to ask my aunt about it. I read the first three essays and plan to plow through the rest for no other reason than I think she really would like that.)

daisy's list is 'things i like to eat' and includes birds, geckos, and cats.


About this time in ...



I want to remind myself that it's a big and beautiful world. I want to wonder as I wander and find all kinds of new and interesting things, not only in those foreign cities but inside myself.



Eating Cuban food and weeping in round into the daiquiries, pina coladas, plantain chips, and giant bowls of black beans.

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