100 Things Worth Doing: 1-25

This entry and others like it to come = 100% inspired by Maggie of Mighty Girl. I loved her idea of making a list of some of life's most special and memorable moments, and I like the idea of holding onto these memories when life seems mundane, hard, or sad. Andrea wrote recently that she heard Elizabeth Gilbert tell a story whose moral was not the message we usually hear -- that we should live in the moment -- but that "the key to a happy life is about having great memories to look back on and great things to look forward to. So take lots of pictures and make lots of plans!" I loved reading that, and it tied into the idea of making this list. So thanks and all credit to Maggie & Andrea for the inspiration.

1. Sledding down a wildflower-covered hill on the Sound of Music tour in Austria.
2. Wandering around Boboli Gardens in Florence.
3. Seeing Paris at night from the top of the Eiffel Tower with my sister.
4. Running the last mile of the half-marathon knowing I would make it to the finish.
5. Walking along the Seine all by myself eating a pain au chocolat on my first day in Paris.
6. Hiking up to the top of Black Balsam and seeing the cloudshadows floating over the hilltops.
7. Hiking through Rocky Mountain National Park.
8. Walking a golden retriever through Chatauqua Park in Boulder.
9. Seeing the view of the snow-covered Alps from the fortress in Salzburg.
10. Walking along the pastel rainbow-colored buildings in Campeche.
11. Braving the bumpy roads to Monteverde.
12. Sitting a hot springs mineral pool in Arenal.
13. Walking through the butterfly garden at the Peace Lodge in Costa Rica.
14. Stirring the makings of peanut butter fudge under my grandmother's watchful eye.
15. Spending the night on a freezing sidewalk in New York and seeing Rent in its first year from the front row.
16. Piling on the bed for a nighttime song with the girls in my cabin at summer camp in the Blue Ridge Mountains.
17. Attending national championship college football games and being a part of a joyful crowd upon winning.
18. Dipping beignet fingers in mugs of half hot chocolate / half cafe au lait.
19. Riding a horse around the base of a volcano in the rainforest.
20. Hearing Anne Lamott speak at a Baptist church on St. Charles Avenue.
21. Driving an empty Friendship Boat across Epcot's World Showcase Lagoon at midnight.
22. Singing with my high school choir in Carnegie Hall.
23. Seeing the protesters lining the sidewalk in front of the White House during the first Gulf War.
24. Building drip sand castles on the beach.
25. Watching my friend's babies being born.

Misc.

Recently, B. and I were in my car, riding along behind a van with a bumper sticker on it that said, "I'd rather be in Puerto Vallarta." I said, "That guy'd rather be in Puerto Vallarta." B. said, "Where is Puerto Vallarta?" And said he thought it was near Baja or something.

I thought silently to myself, "They used to go to Puerto Vallarta on The Love Boat a lot." A beat later, B. said, "They used to go to Puerto Vallarta on The Love Boat a lot."

Battlestar Galactica: The Phenomenon is one of the more enjoyable things I've watched lately. I happened to flip to it and was so pleasantly surprised to see very random celebrities talking about their love of the show -- really their obsession with it. S. Epatha Merkerson? Check. Jesse L. Martin? Check. Brad Paisley? (??) Check. The guy from Anthrax? Check. Joss Whedon? Of course and check. And these aren't just casual fans -- these are people who truly know the show and love the show. And it was all edited together very brilliantly. FANTASTIC.

This guy takes beautiful photographs.

What else? Friday night: crawfish boil with B.'s school peeps. Last night: art show & ice cream. Today: a one-year-old's birthday party.

I'm thinking of taking a graphic novels course. It's a seven-week course, and in addition to other assignments like a paper and a presentation and an evaluation of a collection, it requires the reading of 10 books per week for a total of 70 books. Is this insane? 70 books in seven weeks? Can someone please tell me if this is even humanly possible? I checked out a few of the required books (the professor picks 10, we pick the other 60) yesterday -- the only ones the library had -- The Sandman: Preludes & Nocturnses by Neil Gaiman, The Originals by Dave Gibbons, Out from Boneville by Chris Ware, and Oh My Goddess (volume one) by Kosuke Fujishima. Where in this town are the students supposed to round up 70 graphic novels apiece? I'd like to think libraries but I don't really see that as feasible, and I don't really want to buy all those books. Still -- I see it as kind of a sick and sadistic challenge, and I'll probably try to do it.

One year

One year ago today, my godchild was born. I met her a few minutes after that:

And what a year it has been! It is fun to be a godmother.

Here are some things I will remember about her first year: her baptism, carrying her in her sling through Whole Foods when she was still tiny, the day we went to the fair and sat in the grass, pushing her in her stroller on a walk around the block, seeing her clap, seeing her wave, watching her try to crawl, holding her hands as she took steps, and pushing her in her swing.

Easter feaster

For Easter lunch my mom made crawfish fettucini, dirty rice, cabbage crunch salad, a ham, a turkey, ice cream dessert, rolls, and apple pie. I can't decide if it was over-the-top excessive or just right. I think just right.

On Friday night, B. and I attended a bowling birthday party for a friend. After another 70-hour work week (not complaining; many of my colleagues worked possibly twice that), I was a little delirious and did not get too into the bowling revelry. I contemplated posting a video B. took of me taking a turn but I might be just a little too proud for that as my technique is rather spastic. I saw some school pals there, which was a nice surprise.

Yesterday, we woke up early and went to the farmer's market. We bought grapefruit and cranberry cream scones and brussel sprouts and peanut butter fudge. I tried to nap but it was futile, as usual. I went to my friend M.'s house for a little while to hang out with her and her girls. The Annie soundtrack reigned supreme as usual lately. B. and I got sushi take-out for dinner and watched Michael Clayton, which was better than I thought it would be.

I've been watching a lot of behind the scenes features on the Across the Universe DVD, and the more I delve into this movie, the more I like it.

This morning, I was being lazy and watching The Goonies before we went to lunch. Of course I have seen it one billion times and own it on DVD and loved it so much as a child I used to dream about it, but that doesn't mean I won't stop flipping and watch it if it's on TV. Anyway, I understand that at the beginning all of the kids have their backs turned or are distracted when the Fratelli chase is going on so nobody will believe Chunk at first when he tells them about it. But I don't understand what the giant vat of water is that Martha Plimpton is sticking her head into to cool off. What is that about? It certainly doesn't look very clean. Mystery. Okay -- according to this version of the script: "Stefanie, known to her friends as Stef, is at the docks. The chase passes behind her while her head is immersed in a fishing barrel. She surfaces with a crab in hand and tosses it aside, oblivious to the commotion. " -- but why would she be sticking her head in a fishing barrel? Can someone please explain this to me?

I watched Barack Obama's speech of this week this morning. I had tears streaming down my face for approximately 35 of the 38 minutes. I tried to bring it up at Easter lunch but my mom said even though she heard me and understands that it was a great speech. I feel like maybe she buys into the idea that he's a great speaker, but so what? I tried to explain that reading his first book really showed me what's behind the great speeches and how much more deeply I understand where he's coming from now. She said a lot of people don't understand why he would stick with that preacher for the past 20 years if he disagreed with him so much. She wasn't saying she thought that; she was saying a lot of people are saying that. I was so out of everything happening in the world because I was working so much that I haven't really heard the reactions. I didn't know what to say, so I just said, "People are complicated." She thinks it's really going to hurt his campaign. My dad said he doesn't think it will have as much of an effect as she does. He thinks Obama will get the nomination. Both said they don't know if he can win. It was kind of baffling. My dad is careful not to say too much, I think, because I think they get that I love him. I guess I just don't understand how my mom of all people doesn't understand why Obama would not want to stick with someone who helped to bring him to his Christian faith and in whose church he was literally converted even though sometimes he says fucked up things. I just do not know. It's sort of confusing to me. I love my mom and want to understand where she's coming from.

It makes me sad to think about it, so I think I'm going to eat another piece of peanut butter fudge.

Update

Ah, sweet blessed hay fever. The prickly eyes, the nose on fire, what a joy!

Update, update, update. On Friday night, I tried to overcome some of my hermit tendencies by attending a backyard happy hour. I drank 2 beers, and it was pleasant. I had to dash off for a semi-fancy pants party that was basically at a mansion because apparently lawyers make lots and lots of money. It was fun except for getting bitten by mosquitoes, although they did not ravage me as ferociously as usual. On Saturday, I took a mid-term first thing in the morning and fled my fun-filled neighborhood, exploding with green beer and beads, for the office, which was more than a little depressing. But those are the breaks! When I got off of work, I went to my friend’s house and was very entertained by her daughter singing the entire score of Annie while standing on top of her slide. Unfortunately this occurred in the backyard, which I think sent my hay fever over the deep end to depths from which I have yet to recover. B. and I met them later that night for Mexican food, where I ate a crawfish and onion quesadilla and drank a raspberry margarita so potent that I basically ended up in my friend’s lap telling her how much I loved her.

On Sunday, I went to the outlet mall with my mother, which is always fun. As usual, we listened to showtunes en route. She steered me directly to Kasper, where surprisingly a lot of really cute stuff was on sale. I cannot even tell you how many work clothes I was able to rake in for $250. The most I paid for a single item was $25 for suit blazers. Skirts – like, really fancy skirts that go with nice suits – were anywhere from $5 to $15. It was a beautiful thing! I will now feel like much less of a slob when it comes time to dress up at work. It was nice to spend some QT with her.

That evening, B. and I defrosted some vaguely disgusting lentil/brown rice concoction I made a few weeks ago and cooked some fresh asparagus and watched The Darjeeling Limited, which I thought was a total delight. And I finished re-reading Deerskin, which remains awesome. This is still my favorite part:

"Don't be too hard on yourself," said the Moonwoman, reading her mind, or the black and white shadows on her own face. "It is a much more straightforward thing to be a dog, and a dog's love, once given, is not reconsidered; it just is, like sunlight or mountains. It is for human beings to see the shadows beyond the light, and the light behind the shadows. It is, perhaps, why dogs have people, and people have dogs. But, my dear, my poor child, don't you understand that healing carries its own responsibilities? ... But you have not accepted your own gift to yourself, your gift of your own life. Ash is looking forward to running through meadows again; can you not give yourself leave to run through meadows too?"

I can’t believe Easter is this coming weekend and that I am both working and going bowling on Good Friday. I remember how we were never allowed to watch TV on Good Friday but our grandmother was allowed to watch The Young and the Restless and Jeopardy and it seemed so unfair.

Working a lot this week. Trying to accept the gift of my own life. I probably won't get the chance to run through any damn meadows, but I am looking forward to breathing in some fresh air this weekend.

Updatin'

Taking a moment to take a moment. I want to write down what's been going on lately or I will forget.

On Friday evening, B. and I tried a new restaurant in the crazy new living / shopping / dining compound that feels like something out of a cartoon. I had two strawberry lagers and crunchy rolls and edamame and miso soup because that is what makes me happy no matter what kind of sushi restaurant I'm in, and he had some kind of pasta with pesto and chicken and andouille sausage. Honestly, the avocado eggrolls with the honey cilantro dipping sauce might have been the best part. Also, it was freakishly cold that night.

I was a good student all day Saturday and headed out that night for an engagement supper for my co-worker's son. It is strange to go to weddings and wedding-related events for people when you don't really know them but know their parents. I've always felt very firmly that weddings should be about the couple's friends and not the parents', but I know that's not the way it is in real life sometimes. I love my co-worker a lot, so I went, and it was at a VERY FANCY HOUSE that felt like something out of a very classy episode of Cribs and I definitely enjoyed the wine, fried zucchini, pasta, salad, and bread pudding with bourbon sauce and visiting with co-workers/friends.

Sunday is a blur ... Sunday, Sunday. Oh yeah! I had a late morning coffee with my old friend Herpreet, and we had a great visit. She gave me a 33rd birthday gift that made me cry into my hazelnut latte right there on the patio. Sometimes it is very strange to think that I have now known people for longer than I was alive when I met them, and that applies not only to elementary school friends now but high school friends. Life is going by really quickly but I steel myself against panicking about it on a daily basis.

As for entertainment, I am loving Book of a Thousand Days by Shannon Hale, which is no surprise considering that I also loved The Goose Girl and Enna Burning. I have The Darjeeling Limited and Romance and Cigarettes from Netflix, but there's no telling when they'll actually be watched.

Work is hard, I might fail one of my midterms, and my house is DIRTY. But azaleas are blooming everywhere around me, and somehow that makes it all okay.

If you look to the sky

There's a man all alone
Telling me his friends are gone
That they've died and flown away
So I told him he was wrong
That your friends are never gone
If you look to the sky and pray

--"Cannonball"

Giant beds of flowers are being planted all over town. Signs of spring are everywhere and mean everything.

I love Brandi Carlile so much that is starting to become ridiculous. I just had to turn off the hairdryer because I was listening to "Cannonball" really loud and I had to take a moment to cry. Brandi Carlile's music makes me fill up with feeling until it overflows while I am trying to dry my goddamn hair.

Pizza and wine with a school pal tonight. New pals, old pals. Pals are important.

Marley is watching a mosquito bounce on the ceiling with crazily good eyesight.

Not sure what else to say. Trying to drown out worries about work and homework and the flies that seem to be swarming from our drains and the fact that my front yard and sidewalk have been destroyed by a sewer line repair, and sure, it's only grass, but I was quite fond of that grass, and pull in towards me only what is important and what matters. I'm frozen in my bed till the day comes around, how I'm lost, how I'm found. I miss my sister. I miss my friend in Hawaii! I am depressed about knowing that as of next week, barring some emergency, I will not be able to take a single day, hour, or minute off of work until July and then July is going to turn around and be crazy at work in a whole different way so Lord knows when vacation can occur??? I am emotional. My sweatshirt that I've had since senior year of high school and is in remarkably great shape smells like marinara sauce, like my clothes used to smell when I would come home from the restaurant I where I worked in college. It's very weird how many memories can be dredged up by the smell of marinara sauce mixed with clothes. WEIRD. I'm feeling groggy and wondering how my friend is functioning having not gotten a full night's sleep in basically a year. I just don't know how she does it and I think she must be fueled by the blue eyes and smile of her nocturnal baby and the hilariousness of her four-year-old. I wonder how people function in general. Truly? How does the world keep spinning? Jim Sturgess is in a new movie with an American accent, and the trailer startled me because I expected him to sound like Jude and start singing in the aisles of a bowling alley.

I think I'm going to bed to read Dreams from My Father. Clearly I'm in no shape for coherence.

33

I had a nice 33rd birthday. It started with a nice card from B. and some calls from people singing to me. We had cake and ice cream at work, and B. and I went out for Thai food and he gave me some lovely gifts. Then we watched Lost, during which I had to start crying near the end of the episode.

The next night, I gathered with friends and family in the private room of a Thai restaurant for a karaoke birthday party I decided to throw for myself. I am not really sure what came over me or possessed me to do this. I am more and more introverted the older I get, and I don't gather with large groups of friends very often anymore. But I decided to say "what the hell" and go for it. My parents came, as did my brother. Frankly, any party where most or all of my family can't come is not a party of mine I want to have. And lots of friends, some of whom I hadn't seen in a while. I had no idea if anyone would get up and sing, but 99% did. I kicked things off with "I Believe in a Thing Called Love" by The Darkness. My mom's jaw hit the floor because normally I'm quite stage fright-y about such things. My dad sang "By the Time I Get to Phoenix." B. sang "Summer Wind." M. sang "Behind These Hazel Eyes" and some Hall & Oates song. My brother sang some Air Supply song. I mean, the songs just ran the gamut, and people seemed to have a lot of fun singing them. There was lots of merriment all around, and I shocked myself by actually relaxing and enjoying the whole thing after a few hand-wringing moments of needless anxiety. My brother even figured out some way to set up his iPod on some speakers and play a recording of my sister playing and singing a personalized, re-written version of Ingrid Michaelson's "The Way I Am," which warmed my heart to no damn end.

The next night, B. and I sat down with Italian take-out and watched Gone Baby Gone, which I enjoyed very much. It was great to see Michelle Monaghan again, whom I loved so much in Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang.

Yesterday, I did homework and spent a little time at the park with M. and her girls. My godchild is going to walk any day now, I can feel it. She pulled lots of sand determinedly and ferociously into her diaper. And the four-year-old sang "Tomorrow" at the top of her lungs while swinging, which is always a good way to have one's spirit lifted, and we all drank Icees for the second day in a row.

B.'s mom sent me a basket of four beautiful plants for my birthday. I bought some new pots and some potting soil and potted them yesterday. They are really brightening up the house. It had been so long since I put my hands in dirt, and it felt really good. I hope I keep them alive.

I have high hopes for 33.